A heartbreaking situation

A heartbreaking situation

Photo Credit: unsplash

It is so heartbreaking to hear what is going on with my grandmother. My family all live on the West Coast, while I live on the East Coast. My grandmother is in hospice and my mom and a few of her brothers are helping to visit and spend time with her. My grandmother also has Dementia, so she forgets things soon after you answer her questions.

Since my mom visits and takes care of grandma almost every day, she is there on the front lines. She helps feed grandma and makes sure she is comfortable.

One of my uncles brought in a picture of grandpa. Grandpa passed away in October 2010.

They hung up Grandpa’s picture on the wall so she could see it. Since grandma has Dementia she would ask about him and ask when he was coming to visit. The first few nights, my grandmother’s roommate told my mom that grandma was crying at night. The roommate thought it was because she saw everyone else visit but not her husband. It was heartbreaking for my mom to hear that. She talked it over with her brothers and they decided to take down Grandpa’s picture to prevent further upset with Grandma. After more discussion, they decided to put Grandpa’s picture back up on the wall, but this time it hangs right above Grandma’s bed, so she cannot see it.

My mom also says that grandma is unaware of time. She tells me that Grandma will ask about her parents (my mom’s grandparents), such as when they will visit, etc. It is heartbreaking to hear and I am sure it is difficult for my mom. I asked my mom what they tell Grandma when she asks. They tell Grandma that they are “just visiting” or “they’re running errands.” Since Grandma has Dementia, she asks often.


Photo Credit: unsplash

I hope to visit Grandma soon.

My husband’s work schedule is all over the place. He has split days off and he’s going to school full time. They are going to hire new people soon and once that happens, he can have his weekends off.

I would like to fly back home and stay a night. I can visit my mom and my grandmother.

What would you do in my situation? How would you handle this? Are you going through something similar?


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About Admin

Stephanie is a wife and mom. She has been married for over twelve years and started blogging shortly after getting married. When not blogging at Beauty Brite, she can be found spending time with her husband and son, catching up on Netflix, or working out. Feel free to contact Stephanie for more information on how she can help your company.


  1. clickclickmycat says:

    You just go and see your grandmother and mom. I’m 60 years old, and found myself in that same situation once, many years ago, and I did not take the trip. Now, I live with the regret of my decision. It’s only for a night, so go, and tell her how much you love her. Everything back home will survive. You will feel so much better, in the long run.

  2. I don’t know if you’ve decided but I have been there with two grandparents and it’s absolutely crushing. But take the trip. Even if your grandmother doesn’t recognize you, your mom will likely appreciate the visit and the support. It’s really hard being the day to day caretaker and having a visit from you would very much help, I’m sure.

    • Hey there. Thank you for the comment. I still have not been able to visit. My husband’s schedule is too crazy right now. As soon as it changes, I want to go for a visit.

  3. Awwww, it sounds like your mom could use some support right now. Even if you can’t make the trip, you should definitely check in with her often. She’s got to be under some heavy emotional stress. If you can visit, go soon before plane ticket prices skyrocket for the holidays.

    • Hi Nikki,

      Thank you for stopping by. I hope to make the trip soon. Just waiting for my husband’s schedule to settle down. My mom recently upgraded to a smart phone so now I can text her too! Before it was phone calls, emails and messages through Facebook.

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